June: Wedding Month / Recovery Month

It is almost Father's Day. My wife is asking what I want. I already got it!!!!

The last 2 weeks have seen my 4 grandsons returning to normalcy as well as our daughter! My wife is home this weekend with plans to come home at least two nights a week in the future. Her job of assistant mother / child counselor is showing great results! She is the finest mother / grandmother known to mankind.

Two weeks ago she came home during the week. She returned to find 4 boys glad to have her sleeping on the couch once more. They said as long as she was between the door and them, they could sleep without fear. Nothing had happened, and they knew one night without "Gam" could be had without anything happening. What a compliment to how they took seriously Gam's promise that as long as she was there nothing would happen to them or their mother.

Anyone foolish enough to mess with an old she bear protecting her progeny had better watch out! She is old and has lived her life. She is protective and as much as she cared for her own children, she is even more protective of them when grown with cubs. Never mess with an old she bear!!!

The process from November to the present has tried our nerves and deepened our souls. Like similar trials in the past, this adventure has not been pleasant, but it has affirmed our faith that good and dedicated people will ultimately win.

The boys are acting in a beautiful and normal way. They are no longer easily pursuaded that their mother is evil. When they return home from a visit with their father, they tell us in childlike honesty what went on.

Their Gam has told them they will get the truth from her and their mother, and then they can make up their own minds.

The emotional assaults on Sara do not end. She is getting calls and text messages asking why they can't get together again. Now she clearly states: "You wanted to kill me and my family the night we left. You had a chance to straighten things out and for 2 years you did nothing. It is too late for me to change my mind."

I'm proud of my women: Sara and Lonya. I'm equally proud of the boys and their new normalcy. I hope we move toward the future with good emotions and a determination to conquer whatever challenges life should bring.

No one knows, but we trust God to be our security.

Things are moving along--slowly!

There is no dramatic news in the last week, except that I miss my wife badly, but she is where she is needed!

My son-in-law has a lawyer now, but that is good. He is getting a clear message from his lawyer about how important it is to go ahead and sign the Separation Agreement and abide by the Protective Order.

The boys have good days and bad ones. When they are on a regular school schedule, things seem to go pretty well. On the weekends it is a constant time of fussing, fighting, and vying for attention.

My wife and daughter are trying their best not to use force on them. Standing in the corner is a pretty good punishment, but it often goes in one ear and out the other. Like typical children with too many computer games and not enough exercise the ecoing house becomes their playground and it had my wife almost in tears of frustration last weekend.

I advised her today to get them a big punching bag or mat and put it out in the garage. They can punch and karate kick to their heart's content witout injuring a brother. Children today are seeing too much violence in their cartoons and programs along with the little game computers--the names of which I can't keep up. They are all expensive and they think each one must have his own or it is an invitation to another fight.

When I was growing up and sharing a room with my brother, we knew to behave and seldom fight. That lesson was taught from early childhood and enforced with a switch if we didn't respect momma and daddy. When 2 more sisters came along we were in a small house, but we still had our chores and knew not to be rambunctuous inside the house. The furniture and beds were not play equipment!

I think a lot of this is too much money and too much personal possession to the point the lesson of sharing with one another never gets taught. It is one of the most important lessons of life! My conflicts with my siblings was good preparation in social skills when I grew up knowing how to be respecful of others.

I hate the "me first" attitude my grandsons have. Our other 2 grandchildren do not have this. Maybe it's because they are a boy and girl, but I think it is mostly from better child rearing practices by their parents.

It is what it is and there is progress so I am grateful. We hope they boys can get by with no more counseling or medication than the schools and Gam can provide. Right now, between work and the emotional distractions our daughter is close to insanity, herself, and could not get along without Lonya's help.

I just miss her badly!