Riding Herd on Buffalos

I loved cowboy movies growing up. They were the highlight of TV as we got our first black-and-white set from Sears in the mid-50's. In fact, a kid who didn't like westerns was pretty much out of luck on any given Saturday. I remember Howdy Doody--it had a western theme? My Friend Flicka was on later with the beautiful black stallion. Finally, was my favorite: The Roy Rogers Show.

I dreamed of owning a beautiful Palomino like Trigger. I asked Santa for Roy Rogers guns one Christmas, and got, instead, a Lone Ranger set of 6-guns while my younger brother got the Roy Rogers set. The difference was brown leather for Roy Rogers and black for Lone Ranger. His guns were light and could shoot caps. Mine were silver and 3 times as heavy. Later on, as a father it came to me that children with identical toys would be fighting all the time so our parents wisely got Santa to bring different kinds or there might be a real killing between the Scarborough boys. They were quite competitive!

I was born on March 23 and my brother came along on March 3 the following year! We were almost like twins without having popped into the world at the same time. Momma later confessed to my wife in her first pregnancy: "Don't you dare believe that old wives tale that you can't get pregnant while nursing a baby. Gene's younger brother Charles is living proof that it is a total LIE!"

My brother and I grew up when life was good. There was no A-C nor power steering. Few people had a TV--much less color. Media was more radio than TV and we spent many a night or sick time from school listening to WSB Radio in Atlanta--"The voice of the South." It's funny how things stick to a child's mind! We even survived riding in a car without seat belts or cell phone distraction! Our parents actually had enough sense to drive carefully and slow enough to be safe for their sake and us children.

Like WSM in Nashville, WSB can still be heard in a scratchy way almost anywhere in the SE United States. I still sometimes tune to 750 AM just to feel like home again. Atlanta was not yet to her first million residents. You could play all over the neighborhood safely. DeBell street in Clarkston was nothing but wall-to-wall children laughing and make believing! Anything you did wrong would get back to momma before we got home, and God help us if we did anything immoral or illegal. There was no "wait til your daddy gets home from that SC farm girl."

She would almost always make us pick our own switches! This was my first adventure in executive decision making: what is "just the right size?" If it is too little and flimsy it could cut you / if it is too stiff and big so it won't cut, it might bruise! Dear God, help me pick the right one 'cause I'm gonna get a whipping soon!

One thing I remember about the westerns were cattle stampedes. Even worse was the dreaded buffalo stampede. Where cows could bash the poor cowboy whose horse slipped, the buffalo would mash them all flat as a flitter. Cows would go around the buildings and boulders, buffalo would go through and leave nothing standing! A buffalo stampede was the most dreaded result of nature's wrath. They would spook at thunder and lightening and come over the hill after my cowboys felt the earth shake as a warning. God help the cowboy sleeping peacefully at night with his innocent herd of cows nearby when the buffalo got loose!

We had a small herd of buffalo residing near us at my last house. It was always neat to take our grandchildren by to see these massive animals. Normally children get to see them only at a zoo, but the Red Oak / Castalia area had our own herd. They were beautiful. On of the things which fascinated our small ones was the time a baby buffalo got somehow under the fence. It's momma was close to pushing down that barbed wire before the farmer discovered the little lost baby. Instead of just the momma cow pushing until the barbs hurt and stopped, a buffalo has such thick hide and companionship no fence stands a chance when the herd wants to get to the other side.

I know now why "You can't roller skate in a buffalo herd" was a popular teen song. It stimulated a funny image, but it told a serious truth: try to skate among the hairy beasts and you will get smashed!!!

Now for the application as to why I feel like I am skating in a buffalo herd these days!

Our ECONOMY is a buffalo herd to me. After some 2 years of Depression (notice I didn't say Recession) the buffalo herd of corporate America is getting all the favors, while the small businessman is seeing virtually NOTHING. At last they are talking about "tax credits" and "easier loans," but why has the buffalo herd crushed for so long.

The first response this time in Depression was massive bailouts to financial and investment firms along wit the auto industry. Instead of setting investors back on their feet and customers right, the feet of the buffalo herd crushed them more! The buffaloes running each part of those 3 herds gave themselves bonuses for running their business into the ground.

Did the customer or investor get one red cent???? Not just "NO" but "HELL NO!"

Us American taxpayers now own 61% of GM, but are their products 61% cheaper to the poor fools whose money bailed them out??? Same answer as above!!!

Has the unenforced rules and regulations of the Stock Exchange brought lyers and thieves to justice or removed their securities license from them? Again, same answer as above!!!

How many have gone to Federal Prison for depriving the typical investor of about 45% on average of the value of their investments??? Has my retired school teacher / preacher's wife mother had her portfolio restored. It was wisely managed, but where she had little or non worries, she is in a tight spot now.

I don't like that!!!

I earned a Series 6 Securities license and it wasn't easy. The test is hard and few pass it the first time. I took a course to help me after getting completely buffaloed by the books. The most helpful thing the teacher told us was that most of the multiple choice answers would be similar and more than enough were tricky with very similar answers.

HOWEVER, the way to get passed was to ALWAYS ask a simple queston: Which answer is closest to "Always tell the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth to the client."

I did not know all there was to know about equity management, but that 1 major concept above got me passed with a right good score the first time through---truth, whole truth, nothing but truth! I like that.

Our buffalo herd feeding grounds seem to lack too much of the above for some reason. The honest brokers and managers as well as corporate executives tossed that motto out the window and traded it for another:

Always tell the investor what he wants to hear--profits / more profits / and nothing but profits!

This is a dangerous motto.

Did you know EVERY Corporation in America has the legal right to keep 2 sets of books: 1 for the Tax Man and another for the Investor!! Guess which one shows roses and rainbows while the other shows gloom and doom. What happened to truth / whole truth / nothing but the truth? Why are not the same figures shown to both parties--pay your fair taxes and if it is bad, just tell the investor why you have learned and how you hope to improve the future!

I had my Insurance License first and then added the Securities License so I was pretty schooled in 2 professions which call for utmost honesty. That was not a hard push for me because in my childhood westerns--the good guys wore white hats and always told the truth. Even my other hero, The Lone Ranger, who wore a dark outfit had a white horse and white hat both. Roy Rogers nor the Lone Ranger would ever tell a lie to anyone. As soon as they heard about corrupt land barons or dirty business people in a town, they got seriously on their trusty steeds and ran them out.

Now, if Saturday morning cowboys reflected society 50 years later, Roy's immediate response to hearing of corruption today would be: "Let's take a survey to see what the public thinks! I'm not risking getting shot if it's not popular with the people!"

What a wuss! All of us "made in America" kids would immediately switch to the Lone Ranger and never trust Roy again! Forget his beautiful palomino and dog "Bullet" with lovely Dale Evans and Pat Brady by his side. If he tells lies and won't do anything about crime, I will never send in my cereal boxtops again for a decoder ring!!!.

Things in buffalo herd land are so bad today, we haven't even noticed our .50 box of Kellogg's cereal now costs $5 and has air blown into the mash which makes the cornflakes so we get less grain and more air in that "family size box at Wal-Mart."

Meanwhile, that poor farmer raising the grains is getting about the same price per ton as he did 20 years ago! The boys on the Commodities Exchange in Chicago are riding their Bentleys and Rolls-Royces to the airport for their corporate jets to buy oil futures in Saudi Arabia and vacation for $10,000 a day in Dubai at the same time!

My God!!!! The buffalo herd is thundering at us and we have no place to go! As a small businessman I am making 30% of what I did 3 years ago. I finally met another man in worse shape--he makes $300-400,000 luxury cruisers and is making 10% of what he made 3 years ago. His customers seem to be those described above vacationing in Dubai. I guess a large, beautiful, gas guzzling yacht just pales in comparison to a corporate jet and Dubai.

Does it have anything to do with buffaloes thundering down on us?????